


2 Weeks

by slimshadyA



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst, Gen, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Inspired by Music, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:09:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 10,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27631198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slimshadyA/pseuds/slimshadyA
Summary: A story where Illumi has a fatal disease and has two weeks left but doesn't tell you until there's only a week left. (More like you find out instead)
Kudos: 3





	1. Sweater Weather

**Author's Note:**

> there'll be 12 or 13(i'm not sure yet) chapters in this story and if i made you sad, my bad g. and the chapter will either have the names of songs or the songs will be in the chapter for you to listen to while reading it so. have. fun.

_//Sweater Weather by the neighborhood//_

It was a sun filled day, and you were having the time of your life. Illumi walked ahead and as you walked to catch up, you saw his long silky hair glisten in the sunlight. It was beautiful. Illumi was never one for words but today, his actions spoke louder. He hated crowds but brought you to the beach, your favorite place. He hated the way the sand stuck to his feet, how big the crowd was, but he brought you here because you loved it. The one thing you noticed that he didn’t hate though, was watching the waves roll back and forth. While you guys walked along the beach, you looked over and admired how peaceful he looked while watching the waves. He was also never one for emotions but you looked at him and thought you saw a glimpse of sadness in his eyes.

“Hey. You okay?” you asked.

“Yeah.”

The typical answer from Illumi. You didn’t mind but you hoped he was okay.

You guys spent hours at the beach in silence. The silence didn’t bother you or Illumi. You both had always loved the silence ever since you guys were little. You both weren’t big on affection but the subtle things; hand squeezes, silent hugs, maybe headpats; those types of things. With Illumi, the spectacular or big things didn’t count as much. You knew he was there for you and he knew you were there for him. To you guys, that’s all that mattered.

It was getting late, and around 7:45 you guys decided to go back home because you were both pretty tired. You guys started walking to the car and you asked,

“Am I driving or do you want to drive?”

“You know I don’t like driving.” Illumi said.

“You don’t like anything.”

“That’s not true. I like you don’t I?”

“Well I’m glad to know that I’m the exception.” You smiled. Little conversations like this meant a lot to you. It was a way of reminding you that you and Illumi were here in the present and together.

“I’ll drive this time but the next time we go somewhere, you’re driving.”

\He gave you the look of annoyance.

“Don’t look at me like that. You are old enough to drive, you know.”

“Fine.”

“Ha. I win.” You saw the faintest smile play at his lips. It made you even happier.

As you guys drove, you noticed Illumi staring out the window, watching the view fly by as you drove. He definitely had something on his mind, but you didn’t push on it.

“Music?” you asked.

“That is one thing I will not allow you to do. You play the same song every time and then it gets stuck in my head all the time. So no.” Illumi said while still looking out the window.

“Okay, rude. And the theme song to “Caillou” is very good thank you very much. You just don’t appreciate the greatness of that song.”

“It’s a theme song about a boy with cancer. Come on. If we’re listening to music, I’m picking the songs.”

“Not fair. It’s my car.” you pouted.

“But your music taste is terrible. So no.” He grabbed his phone and was getting ready to play his music.

“At least tell me what song you’re gonna play.”

“No.” He kept looking until he finally stopped and found the song he was looking for.

“Are you ready?” he asked.

“Is the song that bad? If it is, i don’t want to hear it.”

“No, it’s a song that’s special to both of us. Well, at least i hope it is as special to you as it is to me.”

You were slightly confused. You couldn’t automatically think of any song on the spot. You tried to think harder but not one came to mind at the moment.

“Well it probably is but I can’t think of any songs right now.”

“That’s okay. You’ll remember it when you hear it.” You waited while Illumi pushed play on his phone.

Then the music came on. The car was filled with the familiar sound of drums. Then the lyrics started.

_~All I am, is a man, I want the world in my hands, I hate the beach but I stand, In Californa with my toes in the sand~_

You knew this song. It was the song that played when you and Illumi shared the first kiss between you guys. This song held so many memories between you and Illumi and none of them were bad.

“Do you remember it now?” he asked.

“Of course. This song is what brought us together. I can’t believe I didn’t remember it at first.” You started tearing up, not from sadness, but from all the happiness of the memories associated with this song. It got to the chorus and that’s when you started singing,

_“Nothing I wouldn’t want to tell you about no, Cause it’s too cold, for you here, and now so let me hold, both your hands in the holes of my sweater…”_

You forgot how much you really loved this song. It played all the way through and when it was finished you felt Illumi’s hand squeeze yours. It was the perfect drive home.


	2. Silk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was really just a filler chapter

As the sunlight peeked through the curtains of your room, you rolled over hoping to find Illumi but instead you were met with an empty space. As you got up and rubbed the sleep out of your eyes, you looked over at your phone to see that it was already 11:30 in the morning. You were never one to really sleep in so late. So as you put on something more comfortable to lounge in, you started downstairs. But what hit you was the delicious smell of breakfast.

“It smells amazing in here.”

“Thank you.” Illumi said from the kitchen.

“Why didn’t you wake me up earlier?” you asked, walking over to Illumi.

“You were tired. So I let you sleep in.”

“But you know I like to be up early.”

He turned and looked at you.

“Too bad. Now eat.” He sat a plate of eggs, bacon, pancakes, freshly cut strawberries and pineapples on the table. It all looked amazing. You looked up at him in astonishment and said, “YOU cooked all this? Why?”

“Don’t be so surprised. Can’t I just cook for you once in a while?” he said.

“I mean yes you can but…”

“But what?” You looked at him and you realized why you fell for him. His long, silky, black hair, his facial features, his black eyes, everything about him in this moment, made you fall all over again. “It’s nothing. This looks really good. Thank you Illumi.”

“Mm-hm.” He turned and went back to the kitchen.

After breakfast, you both sat at the table and said, “Thank you for last night and this breakfast.”

“Mm-hm.” he said. “Get ready and change into something else. We’re going somewhere today.”

“Oh? Where are we going?” you asked.

“You’ll see.” he said.

“Well okay then. Is there anything specific I should wear?”

He got up and said, “Something fancy but also something you can move in.” and then he left to go upstairs and no doubt change his own clothes.

“That wasn’t much help.” you mumbled.

You were stuck. You couldn’t really figure out what to wear. You did the only thing you could think of at the time. You went to Illumi. As you walked in the bathroom, you saw him in black jeans, black boots, and a green dress shirt. He hadn’t noticed you but you were struck. He looked amazing. He never really dressed up, but when he did, you were star struck every single time. He was brushing his hair in the mirror when he finally seemed to notice you.

“Did you need something?” he asked.

You couldn’t speak. You were still amazed by how casual the clothes looked but how regal and elegant he made them look.

“Hello?”

“Oh, sorry. I was going to ask for help for what I should wear.” you said. You were finally able to take your eyes off his clothes and looked him in the eyes.

“Just try and like match what I have on. Or something simliar. Okay?”

“Yeah I got it. And you look great Illumi.”

“Thanks.”

You walked out the bathroom and made your way to the closet. You looked and found something similar to Illumi. And it was something you could move around in as recommended by Illumi. You pulled out black ripped jeans, a black flowy off the shoulder shirt, with the sleeves being see through. Then the shoes were just normal black high tops because if you needed to move around you though that the high tops were perfect. After you put together the outfit and put on your shoes, you walked over to the mirror and started to do your hair. You just kept it simple and flat-ironed it and just put some gold earrings on to add some color to your outfit. Illumi walked out of the bathroom looking for the keys, and you saw that his hair was the same as ever, but even more silky. You never understood how he had better hair than you but you never complained. He looked over at you, looked away, and looked again.

“You look amazing.” he said.

“You know, I try sometimes.” you said. You smiled and picked up the keys from the dresser.

“Ah. Thank you.” Illumi said and took the keys.

As you guys drove, this time it was you looking out the window. Although, all you had on your mind was the lingering question of why Illumi was doing all this. But you didn’t mind. You were having fun, and even though he didn’t show it, you could tell Illumi was enjoying these things too.


	3. With You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should be in class instead of doing this. but welcome to this third chapter.

Finally, you guys arrive at your destination. It was pretty far out from where you lived so you didn’t know where you were. 

“Would you mind telling me where we are Illumi?” you asked.

“Again, you’ll see.” He got out of the car and went over to your side and opened the door for you. You stepped out and took a look at your surroundings. It looked like the building you guys were at was some kind of studio or ballroom. 

You guys walked up and went inside and you saw the most beautifully lit ballroom. It was just like the one you and Illumi used to dance at when you were kids. Seeing another room like tha t brought back another load of memories from dancing with Illumi.

“Dancing, huh?” you said.

“You always liked to dance so I brought you back to it.”

You both loved to dance when you were little. It was the one thing Illumi actually stuck to and he’s the reason you started. It was always a ballroom style dance with Illumi. He loved the slower songs and you loved the dances that went with them.

“It’s been a while since we’ve danced. Well, for me at least. Why now?” you asked.

“It’s just something I thought we could do before…” he trailed off.

“Before what?”

“Nothing. Let’s get to it shall we?”

  
  


He definitely had something going on but you couldn’t figure it out. And he brought you here for something fun so you didn’t want to ruin this day together.

“I’m coming.” you said. 

He led you to the middle of the floor but walked away to say something to the person controlling the music. You looked around and saw that people around were having the time of their lives, just dancing with each other. Not a care in the world would stop them. It reminded you of how much you really did miss dancing. You snapped out of your thoughts when you saw Illumi walking over.

“What was that about?” you asked.

“A special request. That’s all.” he said.

He then put his arm around your waist and interlocked his free one with your other hand and asked,

“You ready?”

“I don’t even know what song we’re dancing to but sure.” you said while chuckling. 

Then the music started to play. 

_ ~Wise men say, only fools, rush in. But I can’t help Falling In Love With You.~ _

As the words of the song were echoed through the room, you and Illumi glided across the floor. He led you in the steps for this particular dance. It was like before, when you guys were kids. As you guys danced, you could see the people on the floor making room for you two and watching in awe as you moved. 

~ _ Take my hand, Take my whole life too, For I can’t help falling in love with you~ _

Dancing here, to this song, with Illumi, you felt like you two were the only ones in the world. Meteors could rain down and you’d be content with the just dancing. It was true it had been a while since you’d danced but right now, you felt alive. 

~ _ For I can’t help Falling In Love, with You~ _

Those last lyrics, the last step of the dance, you looked Illumi in his eyes, and before you could say anything, he says,

“I know. I love you too.”

The dance stops, everyone around you two claps and cheers for you but you didn’t hear them. You were crying, but not from sadness. Joy filled tears. That liitle moment. That moment of dancing meant the world. 

“Thank you. So much Illumi. Thank you.” you say.

He hugged you and you couldn’t hear his response but he said,

_ “Remember this when I’m gone okay?” _

He led you over to a bench to wipe your tears and for you guys to take a break from dancing. As he handed you a tissue for your face you asked him,

“After all these years, why now? Not that i’m complaining but it’s been so long since we danced.”

He looked away.

“When we were little, dance was something both of us enjoyed. I just wanted to relive that.”

“Well, I loved it. Every moment. So thank you.”

He reached over and squeezed your hand. The only thing, you couldn’t shake the feeling something was going on. That he wasn’t telling you something. But it didn’t matter right now.

“Mr.Zoldyck,” you said while getting up, “May I have another dance?”


	4. Cloud 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the song in here is called Tadow by Masego

Yesterday was one of the best days in your life. You loved how you and Illumi had danced pretty much all night, without a single care in the world. It had brought you both joy, but seeing as you guys danced all night, it also made you pretty tired.

  
  


Today was different. It was a quiet day. You got up, changed into something comfortable, and went downstairs. But yet again, when you first woke up, you turned to find the space in the bed next to you empty. Twice in a row you wake up to find Illumi not in bed. To you it was fine but you had wanted to know why he kept getting up so early. 

  
  


You made it downstairs to see Illumi in the kitchen again, but he wasn’t cooking anything which made you slightly disappointed.

“No freshly made breakfast today?” you asked.

“No.” he said.

You smiled and walked over to hug him. As you hugged him, you felt the coolness of his silky hair on your arms, you felt the way his breaths slightly eased as you held your head against his chest, you felt the way his arms slid around your shoulders, you felt the way he rested his chin right on top of your head. You felt happy and content. You would’ve stayed like that forever if you could. But Illumi broke the hug.

“I gotta go.”

“Where to?” you asked.

“Doctor’s appointment.” he said with a sigh.

“Ah you’ll be fine. Be safe okay?”

“Yeah alright.” He turned and left you alone in the kitchen. 

  
  


It had been about an hour since Illumi left and you didn’t know what to do. You wanted to leave, but he had the car. You wanted to cook but the last time you tried that you burned the food so that was a no. You could’ve dreesed up but you had no plans to go anywhere. At last you just decided to dance. You turned on the tv in the living room, moved the table to the side so you wouldn’t break it or hurt yourself, and started playing your music. 

~ _ Oh Oh, I saw her and she hit me like(tadow), saw that thing so beautiful~ _

  
  
  


It had been a while since you had just let go and started dancing but you felt good. You had no idea if the dance you were doing even made sense but you didn’t care. You were on cloud 9, nothing bothering you, you not noticing your surroundings. 

~ _ Baby like oh, How’d you do the thing, the way that you do it and you ain’t even show nothing~ _

You glided around the room, in your own world. It was like last night with Illumi but right now you were by yourself, and you forgot how great it felt to just let go and just  _ dance.  _

  
  


You were so caught up in dancing, you hadn’t even noticed that Illumi had walked in until you ran into him. 

“When’d you get here?” you asked slightly embarressed and out of breath.

“Just a couple minutes ago. What were you doing?” he asked.

“Well I was dancing until I was so rudely interrupted.”

“You ran into me.” he said.

You got up from the floor and walked over to pause your music. It was pretty loud so it was acceptable that you didn’t hear him walked in.

  
  


“Anyways, how was the doctor’s?” you asked.

He didn’t give an answer. 

“Hey you okay? How was the doctor’s?” you asked again.

He started upstairs and said,

“Good.” Then he went into the room and did who knows what. You couldn’t help but be worried because he looked upset and you wanted to know what was bothering him and if you could fix it. You wanted to go talk to him so you turned off the tv, and went upstairs. You can only hope nothing serious was happening. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if ya want, listen to Friends by Ed Sheeran for this chapter. it'll help with the mood. hopefully.

“Can I come in?” you asked. You didn’t get a response so you tried again. There was again, no response. So you decided to go in to make sure he was okay.

You opened the door and walked inside to find Illumi standing at the window just, staring out of it. You walked up to him to see what he was looking at. But there was nothing. Just the sky and the usual traffic. But you looked at him and saw he looked content. But there was a twinge of sadness in his eyes. 

You gently shook his arm and asked, “Hey what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” he responded.

“Don’t do that. Something’s wrong with you and it’s been showing for the past couple of days.”

You didn’t get a response after that. He continued looking out the window without saying a word. You started to get a little angry, for you couldn’t figure what he wasn’t telling you and why he wasn’t telling you. 

“I just want to help Illumi. Please tell me what’s going on. We can fix it if we just talk about it.”

“I said, nothing’s wrong. I’m fine.” he said without even glancing at you.

You let go of his arm. He was definitely hiding something and he wouldn’t tell you. You sat on the bed and buried your head in your arms. Maybe he had a good reason for not telling you, but you didn’t know that for sure. You just wanted to talk about it. You just at least wanted him to tell you what was going on. But that was Illumi. When something bothered him, he kept it to himself, despite you saying that you were here for him if he ever needed anything. You’d be there if he needed to talk. But he never took those chances. He had always kept to himself though, even when you both were kids. But you just wanted him to open up for once. Just once. You just wanted to help. That’s all.

  
  


“I’ll ask again. What’s wrong Illumi?”

“I already told you. Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine.” he said. He turned around and walked out of the room.

  
  


“Why can’t you just talk to me for once?” you mumbled. You were tired of it. You didn’t mind that he never really put his emotions in words, but when it came to these types of things, you got upset. Not just with him but also with yourself. You thought you were doing something that

prevented him from expressing himself fully with you. But as time went on, nothing you tried or changed helped. All you wanted was just for him to open up fully. That’s it. 

You got up, and were starting to walk to the door to try again when you saw something white on the floor. You found it was a letter that had already been opened. It was probably Illumi’s but he forgot it. So you were going to give it back to him when you flipped it over and saw it was a letter from his doctor. But it was sent out around 2 days ago. You wanted to know what was wrong but you didn’t want to really open and read the letter. But on the other hand, if you did, you thought you’d be able to better understand what’s going on with Illumi. 

You opened it, and began to read.


	6. Acceptance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~The Truth Untold by bts~ is a good one for this chapter

~ _ Dear Mr. Zoldyck, _

_ I wanted to remind you that you have an appointment regarding your condition in two days. But from the last appointment, we discovered that your case of Fatal Familial Insomnia is rapidly increasing. For your age this is widely unheard of as this disorder comes to people later on in their life. But you had indeed said that your family has had this problem for generations. But what we found was that there was a mutation in your genes, which is causing FFI to increase rapidly. Now, in the last appointment you said you had been unable to achieve any sleep for around two days. Since we have been treating you since you were younger, it shouldn’t have caused any problems. But as you grew, your genes rapidly mutated in a way where you would not feel or see the mutations. But the effect it has had on your autonomic nervous system is also rapidly increasing. From the full body scan we conducted last time, we found that FFI is gradually decreasing your resting heart rate, and decreasing your resting body temperture. Since you have had this condition since you were young, the effects and consequences of it have built up all this time. I regret to inform you through a letter, but you do not have much longer to live. In around a week, your heart rate will decrease to almost zero, and your nervous system will give up on your body. I would like to speak with you more about this at your upcoming appointment. _

  
  


_ -Sincerely, Dr. White. _

You finished the letter in tears. He never told you about any of this. But this situation was why he was so distant now and so sad. You couldn’t move, you sat on the edge of the bed, crying, in disbelief. You couldn’t believe that he’d be gone from your life in a week. You were also angry because he wasn’t going to let you know, he would just be up and gone soon. That thought

fueled your anger as you clutched the letter in your hand and made your way downstairs to Illumi.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” you said through tears.

He turned around and had a brief moment of shock, concern, and worry pass through his face when he saw you crying. 

“Why didn’t I tell you what?”

“That you’ll be gone in a week! You were just going to leave me here wondering how i could’ve helped or stopped it. You weren’t going to tell me Illumi.”

He had finally noticed the letter in your hand. His eyes slightly widened and then he went back to his normal state of emotionless.

“Do you even care Illumi?”

Again he went back to not answering. Then something hit you. Hard.

“The beach. The dressing up. The songs. Taking me to the ballroom. The freshly made breakfast.”

He didn’t say anything. Not even a glance.

“Were those all ‘gifts’ or memories or something? You were doing those because you knew you’d die a week from then.” You were really astonsihed. You had no idea. If only he had just told you. You guys could’ve spent a lot more time together and instead of him doing things for you, you realized you guys could’ve been doing things he liked. But he thought for you instead.

“The past two days Illumi, we could’ve been doing things you liked instaed. You shouldn’t have thought of me.” you said still crying.

  
  


“I wanted you to just have lasting good memories with me. That’s all.” he said. But again you couldn’t understand how he could be so calm about this. It was like he’d already accepted it and was trying to move on for the better of it. And it sounded like he wanted you to accept it too. But you couldn’t. Not when he only had 5 days left. 

“5 days left. That’s all we have together now.” you said. “How can you just accept this Illumi. Aren’t you scared? Arent’t you afraid, sad even?”

“I’m an assassin. I was going to be killed sooner or later. Like the letter said, it’s been in my family for generations. My dad had it. So did my mom. They both survived it. And then passed it to me. It’s just a fact. I’ll just have to face it.” he said.

  
  


“Your dad and mom are still alive so there’s hope for you too! You don’t know for sure. Maybe the doctor was wrong, maybe the information from the-”

He cut you off there, “No. You read it. You know it’s true. I have 5 days. That’s it.”

You couldn’t believe anything right now. The tears that had fallen had now dried on your face. You were fueled with anger and sadness. A deadly combination for you two. The full extent of Illumi’s life was now thrown at you. You would lose the person most dear to you in 5 days. You knew of the symptoms but he didn’t seem to have any at the moment. Your world was leaving in 5 days.

“These last 5 days. What do you want to do?” you asked.

“Dunno.” he replied. At that point you couldn’t take anymore, you grabbed the keys and went to the car. You had no idea where you were going but you just drove. Drove away from the house. Away from your problems. Away from your tears. But it didn’t help. You pulled over at a park and sat in silence. Then the tears flowed.


	7. Ambulance

You don’t remember when you got back home. You don’t remember stepping into the house. You don’t remember getting into bed. But you do remember that your world will be over in four days. The sun shining through the window seemed like it was taunting you. Using it’s light to remind you that you’re gonna lose your own light soon. You once again roll over expecting to find Illumi next to you but he wasn’t there. You now knew of why he wasn’t there but you regretted knowing. If you hadn’t read the letter maybe everything would be fine. But also, If you hadn’t read the letter, you wouldn’t know about what was going on with Illumi and you wouldn’t know what to do on the last day when he’s gone. Again, you get up, and walk over to the bathroom but you find Illumi in there instead brushing his hair. You felt a wave of anger come up but you suppressed it. You couldn’t, and you probably never would, understand how and why he was acting so calm. But you had no right to get angry anymore. He hid it from you in order to protect you. That’s just the thing though. You turned around and walked out and went downstairs. 

  
There was no breakfast again today but you imagined that day Illumi had cooked for you. You relived the smells of the freshly cooked pancakes, the sweetness of the fruit. Everything. You replayed the hug you guys shared only yesterday. Everything was so,  _ happy. _ You wanted to do  something for Illumi but you didn’t know what. If he was going to be gone in 4 days, you wanted to send him off with good memories to carry on into his next life. But what could you do. You knew that his condition attacks the nervous system so you weren’t sure if you could take him places. You wanted to do something though so you decided to go back upstairs to ask him what he wanted to do. You tried asking him yesterday but you got the basic “dunno” answer from Illumi. As you walked back upstairs you tried to think of ideas but there were just none that would help. You walked into your room and called out, “Illumi? I know I asked yesterday but what do you wan-”

You cut off when you looked and saw him on the ground.

****  
  


“Hey, hey hey. Illumi! Are you okay??” you ran over to him. He wasn’t answering. You thought about the symptoms. FFI attacks the autonomic nervous system. It must have cut out at his legs. You ran to go get your phnone to call the ambulance.

“My boyfriend just fell and passed out. Get here quick! I don’t know what to do!” you yelled into the phone. 

“Okay Ma’am calm down. I just sent an ambulance to your address and they should be there in 5 minutes.”

You threw your phone and ran back to Illumi. You pulled him into your lap, crying, and said, “Stay with me. You have 4 days left. Not yet. Not now.” 

They finally arrived and set him in the stretcher. They asked if you wanted to ride in the back or if you would meet them at the hospital. You told them you would meet them at the hospitial. You had a feeling he’d be there for a while so you grabbed clothes, a pillow and a blanket because you didn’t want to leave his side. At all. Then you drove as fast as you could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a short one cause idk y but uh here. it was also sorta rushed.


	8. Maybe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one's shorter than the others so like my bad.

“Tell me what’s wrong with him.” you said.

“Miss, like i explained, the symptoms of FFI are rapidly increasing within him. FFI attacks the nervous system making it hard for him to do the things he normally does, like walk. This time it was just the points in his legs, but next time he won’t be so lucky. He has 3 days left now. I believe it would be in his best intrest to stay here instead of going home.” 

You had stayed at the hospitial overnight waiting for the doctor to let you know what wil happen with Illumi and you had just gotten your answer.

“Is there any way he’ll survive. His dad did and so did his mom. Maybe there’s a chance he’ll survive. Is there Doctor?” you said while tears threatened to fall.

“I’m afraid not Miss. This condition, he’s had ever since he was little. It’s built up and slowly destroyed his nerves. He’s just now getting the extent. I’m sorry but there’s no way he’ll survive after the 3rd day.” The doctor walked away.

You walked back into the room and sat next to Illumi’s bed. He was asleep but you took his hand and squeezed it. 

“Hey I don’t know if you can hear me,” you said through tears, “but I love you. Just keep that in mind. I hate you for not telling me about this sooner but I love you. These last three days, we’ll listen to our favorite songs okay?” you got up and sat in the corner to try and fall asleep.

“I’m picking the songs.” Illumi said, his voice hoarse. “No matter what.”

You immediately snapped up at the sound of his voice. You ran over and looked at him with tears in your eyes and smiled.

“Oh come on. My music isn’t that bad,” you said through tears. Illumi reached over but with great difficulty and squeezed your hand. Maybe these last three days wouldn’t be too bad. Just maybe.


	9. Realization

The sunlight illuminated the hospital room through the slick curtians. You were standing at the window, just thinking. You were wondering what you could’ve done to help if only he had told you sooner. You went over this with yourself many times, you tried to get angry at him for not telling you but you just couldn’t. Not with him on his deathbed. But you felt that if only he had told you sooner then everything would be fine. But at last, you couldn’t do anything but be by his side for the last of his days.

The doctor then walked in his room to discuss something regarding Illumi. He asked if you wanted to stay but you felt as if you couldn’t bear anymore heart-wrenching news. So you excused yourself and walked through the hospital to the garden they had in the back. 

  
  


For a place that can bring bad and good news to everyone, you wondered why you felt content staying there overnight. Maybe it was because you were with Illumi, maybe it was because you’ve finally, mostly at least, accepted his situation. Or maybe, it was because of times like these of wandering in the garden by yourself with your thoughts and memories. The garden was truly beautiful and walking around in it made you feel comfort. It brought back comforting memories that you had with Illumi.

You found your favorite spot to rest which was just a simple wooden bench. Surrounding you were patches of roses, tulips, and a few sunflowers. All diverse but yet fitting together so perfectly. The sunlight bursting through the windows in beams made the surrounding atmosphere fairy-like. The flowers had just been watered, so the water on the flowers sort of glowed in the sunlight. The silence of the garden, everything about it made you forget all your worries. Mostly.

Before you knew it, it was already evening time. You didn’t realize how long you had been in the garden, but you were slightly disappointed when you had to go back and be faced with the harsh reality of yours and Illumi’s situation. You walked out of the garden but you picked up a sunflower near you, said goodbye to the garden, and walked back to Illumi’s room. 

You walked into his room, to find him staring out the window, not noticing you at all. He looked sad, which was acceptable considering his situation. But you noticed, his hair had lost his glow, his eyes had lost the faint happiness that was stored in them and his whole demenor was changed. Whatever the doctor told him, drastically changed him. It hurt you to see him like this. 

  
  


“Hey.” you said. He turned to look at you and gave you a slight wave, but not speaking to you. You walked closer to the window and to him to see what he was looking at. But nothing special

was going on outside but the sky was pitch black but the stars were beautiful tonight. He was staring at the stars. That’s what he was looking at. 

  
  


“The stars are beautiful tonight aren’t they Illumi?” you asked, and hoped for an audible answer this time.

“They are.” he said. It was quiet but you heard it. That’s all that mattered. You took his hand and leanded against him. You both stood at the window, enjoying the silence, and watching the stars. You suddenly remembered your promise about the music. 

  
  


You let go of his hand and went to grab your phone. Illumi was a little confused but he didn’t say anything. You looked through your phone, through your playlists until you found the song you wanted. 

~ _ Rewrite The Stars by The Greatest Showman cast~ _

This song was perfect. For this night at least. The stars were beautiful. And the title explained your feelings. You felt as if you could rewrite the stars. Even with 2 days left, you felt that you and Illumi could do anything. It was possible. 

~ _ We're bound to break and my hands are tied~ _

The song ended but those lyrics hit you. Hard. You and Illumi weren’t bound to break per say, but you were bound to seperate from each other in 48 hours. Your hands were tied because as much as you wanted, you couldn’t do anything to change your situation. Illumi was already at peace with his situation and you didn’t want to make it harder. 

It was late and you both were tired, so he layed down back on his bed. But you, you couldn’t fall asleep. And neither could he. You stood there at the window, the drowsiness heavy on you, but your mind and body wouldn’t settle. It really, really dawned on you that you have 48 hours left with Illumi. You would’ve done something big but seeing as he can’t really leave his room, that possibility was out. Before you knew it, you started crying yet again. Silently as to not disturb Illumi but you cried. 

“Why couldn’t it have been me instead? Why not not me?” you said through tears. 


	10. Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was inspired by "Photograph" by Ed Sheeran

Again, the sun shined through the cracks of the curtains. You woke to one of the beams of sun hitting your face. You woke up and checked to see if Illumi had gotten up yet, but you were meant with an empty bed. You started to get worried but then remembered you were in a hospital and he probably was with his doctor. So you got up and changed. By the time you were finished, Illumi had still not come back so you decided to go to your favorite place which was the garden. You just wanted to pass some time and think. You walked down the halls leading to the garden and opened the door to your sanctuary. 

  
  


The door opened and the flowers greeted you. The roses and tulips surrounded you yet again and the smelling of blooming flowers greeted you.

You made your way around the garden, enjoying the walk. You wanted to spend time here with Illumi. You wanted him to see some beauty before he’s gone. You just wanted to spend time with him. You continued walking, and you made your way to your bench, only to find it half occupied by someone else. As you got closer you realized that someone else was in fact, Illumi. You walked over and sat next to him. You laced your fingers with his and squeezed. Just to let him know you were there with him. That you weren’t going anywhere. He squeezed your hand back as a way to say,  _ yeah, I’m here too.  _ It was silent but in a way loud also. It was the silence that was loud. You felt as if you could hear the slightest thing. The growth of the flowers, the subtle drip of the water. Anything. But most of all, you could hear the sadness radiating from both you and Illumi. It was sort of like an accepted sadness though. You both had fully accepted the situation now and were just, waiting it out.  _ 24 hours. _ That’s all you guys had left. Anytime tomorrow, you guys would be separated. You knew this and so did Illumi. Maybe that’s why he started to pull out his phone. You thought he was going to play yet another song, but instead when he gave you the phone, you were met with all the pictures you guys had taken throughout your time in this life together. The time you finally got to go to the Zoldyck’s house. The time you both went to the amusement park. All the times you both spent together as a kid, they were all there. Then there was a picture of when you guys had recently went to the beach. And the time when you guys were at the ballroom. You don’t remember anyone taking pictures of you both but you were so in the moment that you wouldn’t have noticed. That was the picture though. It was the picture that got to you. You both looked happy in it, you both were enjoying each other and enjoying the moment. You started to tear up, from a mixture of sadness and happiness. But in all honesty, you started crying because everything you loved would be gone in 24 hours.

Illumi noticed you crying. He gently took away the phone, turned you so you’d look at him, wiped your tears, and leaned your head against his chest. It was meant to help you stop crying, but it made you cry even more. That was teh last time he’d be here to do that for you again. It was the last time receiving his hugs, his hand squeezes. It was the last time resting against his chest, and it was the last time you got to spend time with Illumi. The next things happened almost so fast you couldn’t catch it, but you did. 

He suddenly seized up, and you wondered if he wanted to stop the hug. You looked up at him and saw his face was turning deathly red. Then his arm started twitching. Next was his body. You almost realized too late what was happening. You called for the doctor, a nurse. No, you didn’t call. You screamed. Finally someone heard your pleas, and 3 nurses burst through the garden door to find you on the ground with the head of Illumi laying in your lap while his body was having a fit. 

The nurses politely yet hurriedly asked you to get but to be careful with Illumi’s head. They put him on a stretcher and carried him out and into the emergency rooms to stop his fit.

You ran after the nurses but were met with closed doors and the nurses telling you that you could not go beyond those doors. You cried and banged against the doors and asked repeatedly why you couldn’t. You wanted to be there with him and for him. But you couldn’t. 


	11. Countdown

You had stayed all night outside those doors waiting for Illumi to walk back out. But he never did. You hadn’t gotten any sleep. You were worried about Illumi. You just wanted to see him. You didn’t care about the sunlight that beamed through the window. You didn’t want to go back to the garden as your last memory there was seeing Illumi suffer a seizure. The one place you had left, was tainted with yet another bad memory. All you wanted was Illumi back. Even if you couldn’t have that, you wanted to be by his side at least. That’s all.

  
  


You were lost in your worrisome thoughts, when Illumi’s doctor had walked up to you. You saw him, and the first thing you said,

“How is he?”

The doctor grimaced but quickly covered it up.

“Well Miss, he suffered a serious seizure yesterday. So serious, that it sped up the process of….” he trailed off.

You couldn’t breathe. It felt like with those few words, the doctor took all the air out of your lungs. It sped up the process of Illumi leaving. You wouldn’t and couldn’t bring yourself to say,  _ dead,  _ because he wouldn’t be dead. He’d live on forever in your memories but even that was painful.

“How- how long?” you asked through a choked whisper.

  
  


“At best, he has until 6 or 7 tonight.” the doctor said. “I know this is hard to take in, and i’m very sorry to put this on your shoulders.”

  
  


“Can I see him now?” you asked, ignoring completely what the doctor just said. 

  
  


“I don’t believe it would be of good interest to-” you cut him off.

  
  


“Not of good interest? He’s dying and will be gone from my life in 7 hours and you’re telling me it’s “not of good interest”?” You were mad. All you wanted was to just go and see Illumi. Especially since his, “due date” was coming up sooner than expected. You were seething. You

were angry and crying. You must have looked crazy but all you wanted was to just go and see Illumi. The doctor noticed it, and he said, 

“Look, I can allow you to see him within an hour or two. No sooner than that. Will that be okay with you?”

  
  


For your liking, it was a bit too long. You wanted to spend every minute you could with him, but you had to wait.

“Sure.” The doctor then left to go back and check on Illumi. But, you just couldn’t hold anything in anymore. You’ve cried a lot in the past few days, but today, everything came out. Everything you’ve been holding in. The sadness, the guilt, the anger, the depression. Everything. The tears wouldn’t stop. You just kept thinking and crying. You tried to relive the things you did together through memories but it didn’t help. It made everything worse. You wanted more of that. You didn’t want illumi to leave you. You wanted more of the home-cooked breakfast meals, more beach trips, more of the dancing in ballrooms. You wanted more of that. You wanted it with Illumi. But, as you were coming to realize, it wouldn’t turn out that way. It would turn out the way that involved lots of heartache, sadness, darkness. You didn’t like that way. 

  
  


Before you knew it, the nurses had come back out and came to the time where you were allowed to go and see Illumi. You practically sprinted to his room, but when you got there, it was not a fine sight.

He was bandaged up all over his arm, he had air tubes connected into his nose to circulate air into his body, and his face and body were deathly pale. The doctor said it was serious, but this? You didn’t expect it, nor did you wish to see it. 

  
  


“His stroke caused the air circulation in his body to be cut off, hence why we had to insert the tubes. The seizure he experienced also sped up and finalized the paralysis in his body. He can still open his eyes and close them but he won’t be able to talk anymore. His whole body’s shut down.” the doctor said from behind you. “He can still hear you but he won’t be able to respond. So you can talk to him if you like.”    


( _Listen to Before You Go by Lewis Capaldi_ here)

“I- thank you doctor.” you said through tears yet again. You slowly walked over to Illumi, taking in his condition, his situation, just taking in everything. You made it to the side of illumi’s bed and for the first time that day, you stopped crying. His eyes were closed and he looked sort of peaceful, even if he did have tubes up his nose. His skin may have been very, very pale, but with

his eyes closed and his hair layed out beneath him, he looked at peace. You reached over and gently grabbed and squeezed his hand. His eyes fluttered open. 

“Hey.” you said with a smile. “I know you can’t respond so just listen okay?” Of course you didn’t get a response but you wanted to let everything you’ve never said out. You wanted to tell him everything at this moment.

  
  


“So I heard about everything. I know you’ll be gone in only a couple of hours. I just wish we could spend more time together you know. More beach walks, dancing in ballrooms, amusement parks, more cooking breakfast for each other. You know all that. But hey, its time for us to separate yeah?” You started crying yet again but this time, it was truely a relief. You continued.

“Thank you for everything Illumi. Thank you for being here with me. Thank you for putting up with me. Just thank you. I honestly don’t know where either of us would be if we hadn’t met. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much to say these goodbyes. I loved our little conversations, and I just loved everything about what we had. It’s time though. Maybe we’ll meet again in another life, and when that happens, we’ll make the most of it.” you finished through tears. You looked over and saw that tears were coming down Illumi’s face too so you reached over and wiped them off.

“Who’s comforting who now huh?” you said smiling. “Also, don’t cry. That’s my job. But enough of the sappy stuff.” you sat back down. “Let’s see we have 3, 4 more hours? Let’s make the most of it shall we?”


	12. Too Late

_ 2 Hours  _

You and Illumi, well mostly you, sat there and talked about the old times and how much fun it was. You told Illumi things about your childhood he didn’t even know. You told him your favorite color, favorite pair of shoes, favorite book. You told him everything he already knew honestly. You sang a little for him. You played music. You braid the ends of his hair like you’ve always wanted. You drew, you slept, you danced. Anything. You pretty much did anything you could think of. You finally, finally accepted what was going on. You had stopped crying and started smiling. You didn’t really think about the past or how you could’ve fixed it. You focused on the present. The here and now. You focused on sending Illumi off with the best memories you could give him. 

_ 1 Hour _

You did everything you could possibly think of. You were out of ideas. But you still wanted to do something else. You wanted to do something to keep your mind off the time limit getting closer and closer to zero. 

  
  


“I don’t know what else to do Illumi. I’ve danced, drawn, talked, I’m pretty sure you're tired of hearing me talk. I know I am.” You sat down on the chair next to his bed and tried to think of something, something else to do. You looked down at your clothes and got an idea. 

  
  


The day you guys went dancing, Illumi said he loved your outfit. 

~“You look amazing.” he said.

“Well you know, I try sometimes.” you responded. ~

  
  


You sat by his bed thinking that maybe you could change into that outfit again and come back. You didn’t want to leave but the outfit was still at home and you would have to if you wanted to change into it. You decided to do it. You stood up and grabbed the keys to the car from your bag and walked back over to Illumi.

  
  


“I got an idea. I’ll be back okay. Wait for me.”

  
  


_ 30 Minutes _

  
  


It was a 15 minute drive from the hospital to your house. You made it a 10 minute drive. You wanted to hurry because he didn’t have much time left. You didn’t want to dwell on that but it was there. You unlocked the door and bounded up the stairs into your room, and went straight to the closet. You started looking for the shirt and the pants, but you couldn’t find them. You looked everywhere in the closet but no luck.

  
  
  


“No no no no. Not now. Why now.” you continued your search in the closet and around the room but you couldn’t find it anywhere. But what you did see in the closet was the outfit you had worn

on your first date with Illumi. It was a silk, but sort of wavy, off the shoulder, dark green dress. You had completely forgotten you had it but you put that on.

  
  
  
  


_ 20 minutes _

  
  
  


You finished getting ready and leapt down the stairs, grabbed the keys and hurried to your car. You wanted to make it back in time. You didn’t want to be late. 

  
  


You drove faster than ever and luckily you didn’t get pulled over. You arrived at the hospital and signed in at the front desk. You told the lady at the front desk you needed to see Illumi Zoldyck and that you were in a hurry. She understood and got you signed in as fast as possible. After, you were going to take the elevator but it was too slow, so being you, you bounded up the stairs. In your dress. You made it to the floor that Illumi was staying on and ran to his room. You ran past doctors and nurses and maybe patients, while you muttered meaningless ‘sorries’ and ‘excuse me’s’ as you were just trying to get to his room. You made the hallway down from his room when you had to stop and catch your breath. You rested for like 2 minutes and then continued your run to his room. You got there. But you were met with a horrible realization. 

  
  


You were too late. 

  
  


There were nurses and doctors surrounding the door to illumi’s room. It was closed, but through the cracks of the little window you could see Illumi in his bed, eyes closed, the doctors using tools on his chest. They were trying to bring him back. 

  
  


You were stunned. No. You were upset, mad even. Not at Illumi or at the doctors. But at yourself instead. You left him. By himself in his dying moments. You should’ve never left him. You should’ve stayed here. By his side. Maybe he would’ve lived a little longer if you had just stayed there. 

  
  


You felt something drop on your hands. You looked and realized it was blood and tears. You were biting your lip too hard to keep from screaming. And you were crying. You hadn’t noticed that you did either of those things. You cleared the blood from your lip, and cleared the tears

from your eyes. You looked up, with a small sliver of hope. It was quickly crushed, You looked up and hoped the doctors brought him back. But you were met with the doctors shaking their heads in defeat.

Illumi was gone.


	13. Release

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when the letter starts, listen to Arcade by Duncan Lawrence

The doctor inside turned and saw you at the door with our eyes full of shock. He quickly rushed out to meet you.

  
  


“I’m sorry Miss. We tried everything we could but there was nothing else we coul-”

  
  


“Stop. It was my fault. I left him here alone.” you said. “You tried, I know. But I should’ve been here. I never should’ve left. It’s my fault.” Pushing those last words out, you finally lost it. You broke down completely, falling to the floor crying. You didn’t care how they saw you right now. You were just in a mindset of nothingness yet sadness. The people around stood and stared with sadness and pity in their eyes. But you didn’t care. All you wanted was warmth. Warmth from the hugs in his arms. You wanted to feel safe again. You wanted to feel invincible. But now… now you felt naked. Afriad. Lonely. You didn’t know what to do anymore. This time, the tears wouldn’t stop. They kept coming. Streaming down your face like water on rose petals.  _ Roses. _ You looked up and into his room one last time.

  
  


_ “I’m sorry. For leaving you alone like that. I should’ve been there. I’m sorry Illumi.”  _ you whispered through your tears. 

  
  


You struggle a bit to get up but you make it to your feet. But getting up made you break down all over again. The tears still kept coming. It was an endless amount coming from who knows where. All you knew was that you got up again, but he didn’t. You were alone. 

  
  


One of the nurses brought you tissues to clean up your face. It didn’t help. No matter how hard you tried, the tears kept coming, they wouldn’t stop. 

“Thank you.” you said.

  
  


“It’s no problem. Were you guys together?” she asked. 

  
  


You smiled slightly, glad to have someone to talk to. Even if It was a complete stranger.

  
  


“Yeah. Yeah we were. 4 years.”

  
  


“Aw that’s nice. You must’ve been really special to him, you know.” she said.

  
  


You frowned in confusion and looked up at her.

  
  


“Well, I hope I was but why do you say that?” you asked.

  
  


“Whenever he came for his checkups, he always talked about how there was one person who kept him at peace. He always said, ‘They make me feel okay about my situation’. “ she said smiling. “He never told us who you were though. But I can see, you’re everything he said about you. Which is probably why he wanted us to give you this.” she pulled out a letter from the pocket of her uniform. “He said to give this to you, you know, after the fact.”

  
  


You reached out with shaky hands, and she placed the letter in your hands. “I’ll leave you alone with that, okay?” You nodded and started to walk over to the benches in the hall, and sat.

  
  
  


It was a simple letter. Just like Illumi. The outside of it wasn’t decorated, just a simple white envelope with a piece of paper tucked inside it. You were shaky, your hands wouldn’t stop rattling. You didn’t want to read the letter at all, but you felt that if you did, you'd have a sense of closure. Some. Not a lot, but enough to get you up and going. 

  
  


You pulled the letter out of the envelope and started reading it.

~ _ If you got this letter, well, I’m gone.  _

  
  


_ It’s hard for this to be put into words, considering I only have a day left. You were asleep, and I could’ve woken you up, but it’s not fair to disturb your sleep just because I can’t get any. This condition is getting worse. I got up today, not that I was ever asleep, but I got up and went to the garden today. I know it’s your favorite place, so I decided to write this letter here.  _

  
  


_ That day we wnet to the beach, you liked it right? Hopefully you did because, I didn’t. It was for you though so I went through with it. The ballroom? That was for both me and you in a way. I wanted you to have good memories of me, ones greater than the time we spent together before. It was also for me because I wanted memories with you before I left.  _

  
  


_ I know I don’t express much, it was the way I was raised. You know my family. You know me. I was bound to die sooner or later simply because of my profession. That’s just what happens when you’re an assassin. I didn’t want to tell you about what was going on because I didn’t want you to worry. _

  
  


By this point, more tears streamed down your face than ever before. You could barely read the letter but you tried your best and continued on. 

  
  


_ I wanted everything to end well, on a good note. I just wanted you to be at peace with everything that was going on. I had already accepted it. It was inevitable. Sure, my dad and mom survived, but there wasn’t really any hope for me to survive it. I accepted that. I lived with it all my life. But all those doctor visits I went to, all the treatments? They were just delaying what was to come.  _

  
  


_ Now here’s what I really need to say. _

  
  


_ I’m glad those treatments did delay it. Because if they hadn’t. I wouldn’t have gotten to be able to be with you. I wouldn’t have been able to spend my time with you. I’ve heard my parents say this, but with them, it was different. They met through violence and fell in love like that. But for you, it was different. I’m not supposed to trust anyone. ‘I can’t let them get too close, they might stab me in the back.’ The mind of an assassin. But growing up with you, changed that. So let me say this. _

  
  


_ I’m glad I met you. _

_ I am. And growing up with you proves to be one of the good experiences i’ve had in my life. My family even likes you. They say you’d be better as an assassin but, you’re not cut out for it.  _

  
  


_ One more thing. My little brother. Kil. You remember him right? Anyways, I can see, well anyone could, but he’s the most talented one in the family. He just doesn’t want to be defined by it. I wasn’t always the greatest brother. So, do me a favor and watch over for me, will you? I don’t want him growing up regretting his choices. I want him to be proud of what he does. Tell him he doesn’t have to stay in the family business if he doesn’t want to. Just make sure he’s safe okay.  _

  
  


_ I lied. One more thing. Do not sit around moping about me. I want you to accept the fact that I’m gone. And do something about it. Make yourself something to feel better. Just take care of yourself. That’s all I ever wanted. _

  
  


_ -Yours truly,  _

_ Illumi. _

  
  
  


It was done. The letter had been read. Your tears hadn’t ceased. Though they changed. From sadness, to despair, to comfort, and lastly, to acceptance.

  
  


You grabbed more tissues, cleaned your face and looked for your phone. You found it on the floor under your chair. When you grabbed it, the screen illuminated to show, the picture of you and Illumi at the beach. You smiled to yourself, knowing that he’s never really gone, because you, and family will hold him in memory. 

  
  


You look through your contacts and find who you were looking for. You click on their name and you wait while it dials. Finally you hear a click and someone sy through the phone,

  
  


“Hello?”

  
  


“Hey it’s me.” you respond.

“Oh yes. It’s been a while since we talked darling. I heard about what happened. I’m sending you my condolences.”

  
  


“Oh it should be me sending you mine, Mrs.Zolydck.” you respond.

  
  


“Thank you very much dear. Now, is there anything else you needed?” she asked.

  
  


“Actually yes. May I talk to your other son?”

  
  


“Milluki?” she asked.

  
  


“Oh no. Killua.” you responded. 

  
  
  


“Oh sure. Wait one moment while i get him.”

  
  
  


You did that. You waited. It felt like forever but then he finally came to the phone.

  
  


“What is it? If you’ve come to tell me Illumi’s dead I already know. And I don’t need your ‘sorry’ either.” he said.

  
  


You winced a little, only because you weren’t expecting him to be like this.

  
  


“Okay then I won’t give you my sorries. But your brother wanted me to watch over you so that’s what I’m going to do.” you responded.

  
  


“You’re only doing it because he wanted you to. You don’t want to. So save it. You don’t have to. I don’t want you to either.” he then hung up.

This was going to be hard for sure. You’re just now realizing that.

  
  


“Why’d you leave me with a challenge like him Illumi?” you grumbled.

  
  


But you weren’t going to give up. You knew it was hard for Killua. You wanted to save him. LIke you did with Illumi. 

  
  


You were going to. You weren’t going to let another member of the Zoldyck’s get away. Not this time. 

  
  


You cleaned up the mess you made, thanked the nurses, and went up to the doctor and asked him,

“Can I see him one last time?”

  
  


“Sure. I can only give you 5 minutes though.” he responded.

  
  


“That’s more than enough.”

  
  


You walked into the dark room. It had lost it’s light. And you had lost Illumi. But it’s not the time for that. 

You walked over to the side of Illumi’s bed. They had taken the tubes out and the bandages off.You looked at him. His eyes were closed, his hair had lost it’s glow. His life had literally left him.

  
  


“I’ll take care of Killua. I’ll get him to follow his own way. I promise. And then, I’ll come to you.” you kissed his forehead and walked out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that concludes the story. i might make a sequal showing what happens between the reader and killua, there would be a good and sad version of that also. maybe. i'm not sure yet.


End file.
